Don’t you hate when people say they regret absolutely nothing. I mean really. Apparently they never had a one night stand with Rando McNasty-Skank. Or maybe they did and they really enjoyed it. But whatever. I’m not going to list {all} my regrets on here. Well at least not today.
My most recent regret: Asking my husband before making a decision. I should have known that Negative Nancy John Paul would not agree with me on adding HBO to our Direct TV. But being the good and faithful wife that I am I asked anyway.
Convo: (through text of course)
Beautiful, Amazing Wife (BAW): So Berty I think I’m gonna add HBO to our package so we can watch vampires have sex True Blood
Mean Ole’ Husband (MOH): No.
BAW: Please. Please please!!!! *sad face with tears*
MOH: Umm. No.
BAW: But I want it!!
MOH: You won’t even watch that channel. We are poor and applying for food stamps. So…no.
BAW: But I will watch it!! I will watch it everyday! And have sex with you!!! PLLEEAASSEE!!
MOH: You won’t have sex with me. No.
And that people is why you should never ask your husband’s opinion when making majorly important decisions involving vampires. I think I will add it anyway. I pay the bills and he will never know. (Unless he reads this blog!)
3 comments:
You are effing hilarious! Seriously-sell tickets,cause I want to come to the show. Where do y'all live?? (If you don't mind me asking-I'm not trying to be stalker-ish)
I think people who spout that crap about not having regrets are either total liars or majorly living in denial. Hell yes, we ALL have regrets. Whether we choose to dwell on them or not is the real issue :)
Fortunately for me, my husband has no opinions. Unfortunately for me, we just realized how broke we are and canceled HBO and Cinemax 2 weeks ago. I'm in mourning for my sexy vampire Eric.
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